Anticipation Anxiety.

Ok so I have a few weeks left (approx 5) and I am getting such anxiety. I generally am an anxious person who worries excessively anyways but I find I cannot calm down much. I hope some of you can give me some advice.

My daughter turned 15 months old on July 4th. She is the absolute BEST thing that has ever happened to me and I worry that I will not be able to give her all my time like I do now. Although my husband will be home in the next month I dont really count on him for much (he dosen't get up and help at night) and he really gets frustrated easilly. I feel so sad because I dont get to take her outside as much as I would like, I cant pick her up and carry her for long periods of time and of course running after her is getting more difficult by the week and our yard is not fenced and we dont have any yard toys (they are at my moms). I feel like a terrible mom, I feel so damn lazy. I worry about having to be up at night and being aggrivated and snapping at my older daughter because I know I am grouchy when tired. I feel like I need to roll out the Xanax but definately not while pregnant. Anyone else have extreme anxiety problems or take anxiety medication (not necessarily pregnancy related)? Before I even had my daughter I worried about EVERY single thing that didnt even happen yet, my doctor says that I anticipate a disaster I live in the "what if" and work myself up - just wanted to know if anyone can relate.

GUILTY! Not preggo and I don't have kids but I have been on wellbutrin for about 6 months (lexapro for several years before that) and xanax as needed (not while TTC) and just the fact that I can't take my xanax if needed sometimes makes the anxiety flair up. The wellbutrin has helped but I am still a worrier. And I worry about stupid stuff (I don't admit to this regularly) but crazy things like - what if I have to pee - is there going to be a bathroom there, or forgetting something at the store - I go over and over my list while I am standing in line.

You aren't alone and I can so understand thinking about having to take care of 2 kids under 2! I wouldn't know what to do with myself!

Try and relax (yea right, I know) I am sure that you'll get into a routine with the kids and all will work out!

*hugs*

Liz

Liz,

Thank you for your response, I dont get many when I post. But do you like the Wellbutrin? I never started the Xanax because I found out I was pregnant literally days after I got the script. So my question does it make you sleepy? I was going to start taking it when I have her but I need to be able to get up at night obviously. I had a prescription for Klonopin which I took two of so didn't feel any effect. I fear medication so everytime they give me something I dont take it to get the effect, guess thats the first step. I cant win with myself.

Vanessa

PS: How's TTC going?

LOVE the wellbutrin! It is much better then the lexapro for me. The xanax makes me tired if I am sitting still or if I take it at bedtime - if I am up moving around I am fine. Also a lot of the time I take 1/2 (since I malabsorb - not sure if you had RNY or not off the top of my head) but that lessens the impact then I take the other 1/2 2 hors later if I need it, for me the whole pill wears off in about 2 1/2 hours anyway so this keeps me more even longer. I call it my miracle drug because it has gotten me through so much. I would have had to stay home for a week with the miscarriage if it weren't for the xanax - it brought be back to being "human" enough to work and function - and I have a job where I need to be on top of my game and focus. I hate taking meds too but if it makes me "me" agian I am all for it.

Liz

PS - TTC will commence in August - thanks for asking! She wanted me to have one normal cycle first, and I see her on the 17th and hope to get the go ahead! We are both so anxious for me to be pregnant again (more anxiety! lol)

It tough. You WILL be tired. You will get frustrated. Make sure you get some meds before you leave the hospital if you even feel like you might need to. I waited a few weeks, and still am not back to normal. I need an adjustment.

Maybe discussing these issues with your OB now so you guys are both prepared for some signs that you may need some help with functioning post partum.

I can't help with any kids issues or medication. I can say that I understand the worrying. My husband thinks he is funny when he says "Do you worry that the sun will come up in the morning". I always laugh because that means I am in my worry mode. I do worry about lots of things. I am a planner, organizer, and list maker.

All I can say is that everything will be ok. You have been blessed with the biggest gift which is to have a healthy child and a second one that will be here shortly. Recognize any signs that are not normal and talk to your OB about it and get medication if needed.

Vent on-line if you are frustrated to keep you from being frustrated with your kids. Or, just look at them when they are being difficult and see them as the wonderful blessing from God and maybe that will make you smile when you are frustrated.

Hang in there,
Traci

Tear, tear...that made me sob! I appreciate your post and you are absolutely right....having healthy children is the greatest blessing. And I didnt have any problems TTC considering both times I got pregnant within a month of being off the BC. So I will think about your post when I feel frustrated, I know that there are a ton of women TTC and cannot and would take the non sleep for anything. I need to be happy for what I have. I think I know the answers to my own questions but like to get reassurance! Thanks again Traci and good luck to you.

I urge you to talk to your doctors about your anxiety, and you worries now and once your in the hospital.  My husband does get up with our daughter now...but otherwise he's been so depressed he isn't much help.  I can tell you from past observation (family & patients) that lexapro doesn't seem as well tolerated and helpful as wellbutrin.  I know after I had my daughter I definately had some "baby blues" but my doctor didn't take me seriously.  I mean I thought about driving over cliffs because I was overwhelmed, etc.  (never of hurting my daughter just me, as if that makes it okay...).  Anyways- I had to work through it alone...because my family Dr left the practice, my OB / changed from my high risk to delivered my daughter to a clinic setting for my 6 week appointment - and when I told them, they suggested I talk to someone and then the next breath signed me back to work.  Huh?!  I went through a period of depression when I was younger and the welbutrin did wonders, and some how I could just tell when I was able to back down off of it.  I don't have any personal experience with true anxiety meds, but the welbutrin helped with my racing worrying mind / thoughts. Good luck, and we're all here to listen.

I don't have any med advice -- but I admire anyone who can be so pregnant and deal with a 15 month old!

Good thing you recognize your anxiety and hopefully the docs can help. 

I know it's "normal" to worry to a point.  Cooper is almost 3 weeks old and I am sleeping in his room with the light on so I can easily turn my head and watch him.  (watch him breath, watch him sleep, etc). 

I think I will be worrying about him for the rest of my life!

Keep us updated.

Cindy

Cindy

Cooper is just so damn cute, and from the zoo pictures doesn't look like you even need to lose anymore weight, you look fantastic! Thanks for the kind words, I am trying to have a more positive outlook instead of always contemplating the bad or negative.